Saturday, December 23, 2006

A Dad-ism in Action

My dad rocks. This is him holding Maddie. We sometimes call him the Ninja because he disappears radomly and we don't know where he is. All in all though, he's a pretty handy guy to have around.

Anyway, to put a dad-ism into real world useage, today my refrigerator took a shit. Nothing is staying cold in it. John jimmy rigged it to work over the holiday, but he jazzed it all up and I think we need a new one. I tried calling dad for advise, but I couldn't find him today, oh well. John fooling with electronic things is a little scary, but hopefully this will make do. Dad can check it out before church tomorrow, I hope.

Oh, and dad, if you read this, thanks for putting in my new hot water tank when my old one took a shit.

Like I said, he rocks.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

More Grandma-isms

You know it's a going to be a great day when a classic Grandma-ism is uttered by one of the 6 year olds you work with. This happened to me on Saturday.

I was helping the kids do a puzzle, but told them to switch a couple of pieces because they were "jazzed up". The kids said, "Yah, Miss Jen, it's sorta all jazzed up." This was one of those "you touch more lives than you know" moments. Grandma will never know the kid, but the kid will always have Grandma's phrase to use at will.

I originally thought the phrase "jazzed up" came from my dad, but he gives credit to Grandma, so there you go. If we're talking phrases my dad made up, I think my favorite of his happens to get used when something is broken. When said item is broken, it "took a shit" figuratively speaking. As in, "We need a new dishwasher, our old one got jazzed up and took a shit."

Grandma does have other good phrases though. I personally love the term "crap-shit". This term is to be used liberally over the holiday season, as in: "Look at all the crap-shit that's on sale at Walmart." I am sure that 90% of my kids gifts from Santa and others will be crap-shit as well. Say it out loud, it just makes you smile. Double entendre or not, crap-shit is just fun.

The last Grandma-ism for the day is "Dorky-dork". I enjoyed this term this past Thanksgiving when she refered to my dad as a dorky-dork. Not only is he a dork (a term not used enough past the 70's for sure), but he's also dorky on top of that. The man who still ownes and wears a pair of Bear's Zubaz pants is indeed, a "Dorky-dork".

Feel free to use any of the above. Somehow someday they'll make it into Webster's. Hey, you never know.....

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

She found em!

Maddie found her feet. Don't they look delish?
So sweet and innocent, and she's a peanut too. According to the charts, she's 90th percentile height, 30th for weight. Her features are more petite than the boys too. I don't know what to do with this tiny baby girl. She takes after her dad's side of the family for sure!

Betcha didn't know

That the Star of David did not lead to Bethlehem. It led to my backyard. Though the pics are Grainy (hey, it's a holy star), this is what I see when I look out my kitchen window. Yes, the lighted strings extend over several houses and multiple yards are used to support the thing. O Holy night. The star is brightly my backyard.

A 3 yr. Old's Special Christmas

Last week I sent Jack out with my sister in law to pick out ornaments for his teacher's Christmas gifts. With things like this, I like to let Jack make his own choices, that way, the gift is truly from his own heart. For whatever reason Miss Rose HAD TO HAVE the cowboy Santa. It is still unclear as to why.

This is the star of the Christmas show at school. Everyone was dressed in holiday style. Not Mr. Individuality. I let him choose his own clothes in the morning. Yellow sweats on a cold day, though not festive was quite appropriate.
He's going to have an awesome Christmas. He's getting everything he wants, save for a Light Saver like Dark Gator has. He doesn't need assistance with weaponry, he turns sticks in the backyard into swords, and he certainly cannot have a toy from Star Wars, which he's never even seen.

Still, to be a kid again and get everything you want. Now THAT'S Christmas.

Friday, December 15, 2006

He said WHAT???

Yesterday I had to pump because the Divine Miss M was sleeping so much. I was informed by my 3 year old that "Mommy, your Boo Boo's do an excellent job getting squeezed and making milk for Madilynn. Excellent, mommy. Excellent".

Oh, and did you know that Baby Cheeses went to sleep in a nature up in Heben? He did Mommy, he did.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Everyone knows Nate

This is funny, really. Today, I rushed Jack to school and was getting ready to rush Maddie to the doc when my good friend Jenny said she'd take Nate to play with her little one. It worked out perfectly, and according to her, he was fine. I still think she's making part of that up, he's a boy, they get ornery.

Anyway, upon rushing back from the doc to see Jack's Christmas program in time, I met Jenny back at school. We were sitting together watching our children and conversing when she casually threw in an "Oh, by the way. Nate bumped his head in the playroom, but I didn't see a bump or blood." I was amused, only because everyone is just a little nonchalant now about Nate and his damn head wounds. He IS fine, really. And I'm glad he did it at her house because if ever I were questioned about abusing him, I can send DCFS directly and "do not pass go" to church, the gym, my grandmother, and my friend Jenny.

It is a relief that if he's going to hurt himself, it's not always on my watch. So says Mom of the Year.

Sick kids

Every one of em. Thank goodness there's only 3. Jack has pharyngitis and upper respiratory issues, Nate has an ear infection, and Maddie at the moment is only viral.

This however, has not stopped Jack from trying to sneak marshmallows and chocolate chips for breakfast. Here's dummy me telling the doc that "yah, his appetite has been low lately". Well DUH! It's because he is up at 5:30 sneaking the marshmallows you bought to have family bonding time and make Rice Krispy treats with. Just like the commercials, I had planned on spending loving, quality time baking with my boys and licking batter. I can hear the music in the background..."oooh, oooh, oh, somewhere over the rainbow...."

Nope! Plans ripped to shreds with evidence of gnarled Marshmallows which have now gotten hard from all the teeth holes in the bag. The tune continues...
"Someday I'll wish upon a star and wake up where the KIDS are far behind me...where troubles TURN INTO lemon drops and I get to take a hot shower...somewhere over the rainbow"


Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Another Great...

Blog to read:

This chick just rocks with her intelligence and insight into life in suburbia.

Check her out.

Things I can't believe I just said...

I'm eventually going to make a list. For today, it's

"Nathan, stop. Nathan....stop. STOP EATING THE PAINT!! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!"

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Just some photos

Um, Guys? Do I LOOK like I wanna be a cowboy?

Look at the Happy baby girl!

Evil Elves

In working on doing my Christmas card, this is one of the pics we got. Pretty accurately depicts life here at the ranch.

19 Weird facts

About death...

Saturday, December 09, 2006

The best smile

I haven't posted any photos of Miss M. lately and these are already a month old, but she has a great smile and laugh, even if she has the look of a balding old man. My mom gets mad because I call her Larry. When her hair is drying the little fuzz on the sides stick out and she looks like Larry from the 3 Stooges. The other day my sis in law took Maddie's baptism photo home and remarked how much like her father this kid looks. She does. And sometimes it's scary. She's a Mini John.
Madilynn seems so tiny to me compared to the gigantors the boys were at her age, but Hubby's family are like little Irish Leprechauns. They're all short and tiny, but have the biggest, most fun personalities. His Grandma was a firecracker for sure, and sometimes I ask Maddie if she's Grandma C reincarnated. Usually she laughs at me or smiles big, but I'm sure she really doesn't know what she's so smiley about...or maybe she does.

That's okay though, John's grandma rocked and I miss her. I just hope that if my daughter's genes truly carry from that side of the family that she has the spitfire in her that all the women on that side do. She's going to have to contend with these boys somehow!!!

Refreshed on Mexican Food

Tonight I went to a wedding shower in the city at a Mexican restaurant, near Wrigley, in fact. It was awesome, we had Mexican food, Margaritas, and Dos Equis beer. There were about 30 women there, and I got to catch up with some friends I hadn't seen in a long time. I cannot tell you how excited I am about this upcoming wedding for my friend. Kristin was such a Godsend when I got married, she was a HUGE help.

I have been very blessed to have such awesome friends, but that's neither here nor there. This was probably the best shower I've ever been to, very laid back and casual, people got to talk to one another and have good conversations, and the food was Awesome. Watching her open gifts made me want to get married all over again, mostly so I could get some new stuff. I will NEVER go through what I went through when I got married again. Next time I'm eloping.

In fact, I wanted to elope (and now I'm rambling), or at least get married somewhere tropical, on a beach maybe with a bonfire and a pig roast. Hubby of the Year however, wanted to do the traditional thing, and I still am not sure why. To this day he says he wishes he could have spent more money so that it was a little nicer (for me). He was 23 and we did the best we could since we paid for most of it ourselves. It was fine.

Besides, I didn't need a HUGE beautiful wedding, (although it turned out perfect for me). I wound up with a beautiful marriage and 6 years and 3 kids later here we are (Our anniversary is next Saturday) still having a good time and waiting for the "hard" part of marriage to kick in.

So now that I have been refreshed with good food and conversation, and a bout of writing, I'm going to stagger exhaustedly up to bed.

Buenos Suertes!!!

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

How could you not

Love this....

Thank you You tube for letting people video tape their tvs.


Thoughts and Prayers

I heard two things today that made me thank God for my blessings. I may not have anything to wear to my friends shower Saturday, I may only have one pair of jeans that fit, but I have 3 normal, healthy kids. I've got a million dollar family, really, and when I think of all the "THINGS" I'd like to have that I don't, I just remember what I do have and I am grateful.

I got an e-mail from a friend whose husband is very ill with viral encephalitis. I won't say her name, but I will ask for prayers. She has 2 young kids, babies really. Please keep her in your thoughts, hopefully the power of prayer will work and everything will be just fine. Having been thru Super Hubby's cancer scare recently, I can imagine how she feels and my heart is with her.

That is, my heart is with her if it can be torn in a million pieces thinking of a little girl at Jack's school (not in his class) who was found to have an AVM.

SHE IS FOUR YEARS OLD!!! She is having BRAIN surgery twice later in this month. And my husband and I thought it was a crisis that our STUPID TREE FELL DOWN!!! How awful are we??? Granted, we didn't know, but our problems are so so small. It is true that the Lord only gives us what we can handle because the worst I could handle was 2 kids hospitalized with Rotavirus, not BRAIN DISORDERS!! Think of her, please, and if you believe in a higher being (which I do, but question my beliefs on God and all that...another blog) pray pray pray for this little soul, and count your own blessings when your family sits down to Christmas dinner that someone YOU love is not in the hospital fighting for either their life or some semblance of normalcy from what their life used to be.



The tree is up. I did it today with a little help from Captain Jack. Yesterday/last night was a different story...

It was seriously like something from a movie. Daddy-Oh thought he could at least get the tree up himself. I came home from grocery shopping to some seriously dirty looks. I had to throw some things in the freezer and proceed to breastfeed, so Daddy had to put the rest of the groceries away. The tree fell. Water and gunk were all over our new carpet.

True to Clark Griswold and the Dad in a Christmas story I think I heard mutterings out of my husbands mouth that in 30 years on earth I've never heard before. I'm not sure I understood what some meant. He actually told Jack that the tree fell because he (daddy) put in new carpet. I was nursing and trying to hide giggles behind my hand, because no holiday is complete without a semi-disaster. I half expected him to run across the street and saw the neighbors tree down and have to chase squirrels out of my living room all night.

Karma got me though, Nate crapped in the tub and had to clean it up. HE thought THAT was funny. Ugh!

Monday, December 04, 2006

Injury of the Day (A Report)

Life is a dangerous sport for Nater Tater lately. In fact, after I told my mom about his latest head injury, she told me I shouldn't be taking him to the grocery store, people are going to think I abuse him. Since he's had 2 incident reports written on him in less than 24 hours, I feel relatively safe rom being arrested at least. However, there are those "questioning glances".

An Explanation:

Yesterday (Sunday) we did our usual routine of running out the door 5 minutes later than we should to get to church. I always take the kids into the sanctuary for the first 15 minutes, after which time Pastor does a children's service, and my kids go to the nursery to play. After church Jack goes to Sunday school, (which incidentally he missed yesterday). All was going well until I took communion and on heading back to my pew, the nursery babysitter came to get me. She was young, but her mom who runs it was there, so I felt safe leaving the kids. Poor Nate had fallen and hit his head. NASTY bump.
So Nasty we almost went to the ER because I was afraid of a skull fracture.

However, I knew he was okay when he broke free from my loving embrace (to hold on an icepack) to eat the donuts that the old people put out for "fellowship" time.

He's fine, by the way. Pastor called last night to see how he was doing, and so did the Nursery Lady. We win an award for sustaining the first injury in the nursery. They never saw my boys coming.

Explanation 2: I try to take the boys swimming every Monday since John works from home. Went early today and was mid-exercise class when the gym babysitter came to tell me that Nate bit his lip and now has a swollen, bleeding lip. Nice.

So, not only does my baby have a head wound he also has a fat lip. As I said, my butt is covered thanks to incident reports. Otherwise, with such an accident prone kid, I may be writing my next blog from the confines of a Child Protective Services Lockdown facility.

Merry Christmas, right?

Saturday, December 02, 2006

The Tree

I just wanted to let everyone know that 8 days after sawing down an evergreen in the middle of a forest it is still sitting in my garage undecorated. The goal is to get it up today. Just letting you all know. Christmas Queen is having a tree crisis.

I don't wanna get off on a rant here....

But I really do. There are just things that have been bugging me to no end.

Like, what the HELL is the BIG deal with this Barak Obama anyway? I get it. He's an Illinois Senator who may run for president. I don't know about other states, but this dude is EVERYWHERE. On Oprah. On the news. On Entertainment Tonight. In the papers. On the radio. ENOUGH!!! He's a senator who doesn't seem do be doing any "senating". Just traveling around signing his stupid books. What does he stand for as a Senator anyway? What's he accomplishing in Washington if he's traveling around writing and signing books? Get off your high horse, and do something other than talk about how awesome your trip to Africa was. Be an effective representative for me, will ya?

And another thing. Occasionally I will flip on the t.v. during the day, maybe catch 2 or 3 minutes of Oprah, or the View. Oh, the View. ROSIE. I personally have had ENOUGH of her and can't stand to even think about turning that show on. She dominates every conversation. She interrupts the other hosts. All she can talk about is how everything goes back to being a lesbian and frankly, Rosie dear, I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!!! It's not all about you and your oppression. You are not a good example of a "strong woman with a voice." You're a has been trying to come back. Do something other than thinking you're so cute and funny. Stop calling grown men "Cutie Patooties". You, Rosie, are annoying and are ruining the show. Take that Barbara Walters!!

And really, ENOUGH with Kanye West!! Do you REALLY think that DUBYA hates blacks, or were you just trying to make a stupid statement and sell records? I've heard the non radio approved lyrics to "Golddigger". Do you really think that they're appropriate to be spitting out and then claim WHITE MAN RACISM? Why aren't more people pissed about this? Seriously! I'm with the Dixie Chicks on this one. Practice Freedom of Speech all you want, but then don't go and complain that WHITE MAN keeps you down and then go and use that N word about 800 times in a 3 minute song. Gain some self respect Mr. West. And I'm pretty sure DUBYA doesn't hate blacks, but after your comment, I wouldn't blame him for having personal issues with you. Don't get me wrong on this either. I'm not a DUBYA fan lately. I too,am embarrassed he's from Texas. Hell, at this point I'm also embarrassed I voted for him and feel like a lot of innocent American TEENAGE blood is on my hands thanks to our crappy war in Iraq policy, but that's another rant.

Right now I'm just hoping the war ends before I have to think of sending my beautiful baby boys to Canada (I don't care if it's illegal, I WILL do it). DUBYA and his crappy war are not laying hands on my flesh and blood, especially since we don't know what we're fighting for anymore anyway.

In conclusion, in the words of the wise Forrest Gump: That's all I have to say about that.

Until tomorrow at least.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Yes, they really do that stuff

Today I had a "Wow" moment. It wasn't a good wow though. We dropped Jack off at school. We ran some errands. We went to Ms. Deena's music class. We were early and men were painting in her hallway so we (Nate, Maddie and I) went into an adjacent classroom lest I be the one repainting where there were tiny handprints on the wall.

It was a huge room. HUGE to run around in. And run my 17 1/2 month old did. With my keys. Straight to the ONE non childproofed outlet in the room. I didn't think kids really did that stuff. It was sorta made up by saftey people to scare us new moms. But yes, they really do. Luckily I caught him before he did any damage.

Note to self: Don't tell a child NO when something is dangerous. It gives the allure of the forbidden. Then they'll want to do it even more. Not sure what the other option is, but don't make something bad look appealing by giving it a red light.

Please tell me my kids aren't the only ones trying to electricute themselves!!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Enter the Griswold's

Sunday we we missed Bear's Kickoff to hunt for our fun old fashioned family Christmas perfect Christmas tree. Here it has been spotted by Numero Uno. The tree farm idea is great, they have a warming house with hot cocoa and sell pine cones for a dollar. Our tree came with pinecones anyway I think, so we didn't buy any. Daddy, boys and sharp harmful tools are always a winning combination. Jack did most of the hard labor here. We had such an awesome day too, it was in the mid fifties up here. Sure it was early to get a tree, but why freeze if you don't have to? I'm sure Maddie preferred it this way, as did I. Said tree is still in the garage sitting in water however. Hard to decorate with babies!!!


Here is the Divine Ms. M. with her first Turkey leg. We went straight from breastmilk to bone- in protein.

Hours and hours of preparation led to this....the
Happy Meal Lion Toy decided he was hungry and wanted some of mom's pumpkin pie. Rarrr!

Check out the food spread here! It was awesome, except for the Brussels Sprouts. On principle they are just gross. Of course, the cranberry chutney sauce and veggie dish (always my faves) were perfection, and 5 days later still are delish!

Brooke's first Thanksgiving...she got one of the turkey legs!!! Mmmmm....

When I was a little kid....

I was informed by my oldest, the one there with the Scooby Doo cup and utensils up his nose that "When I was a little kid mommy, I used to play with those toys". Referring to Nate's toys. Apparently, according to him, he is not a little kid, but "A big Man".

My, how time flies.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


I'm not usually a fan of country music, but can't help love this music coupled with the amazing artistic images. My cousin Erin is an incredible artist, for some reason some of the images made me think of her, and her beautiful talent. I regret only that the ability to create art is not a talent I inherited from my dad's side of the family. She however, was blessed, and I love telling people that I am related to a bona fide artiste!!

Back to the song...There is something so powerfully peaceful about the lyrics, listening to the words makes me realize my babies are ever more precious. There are so many horrible things in this world, I am glad they can "keep the world at bay for me."

I am thankful this year for my blessings times three. Although they never really are "peacefully silent" they are my salvation. Enjoy....

Monday, November 20, 2006

Power Rangers at church

Yesterday, Jack had a Sunday School lesson on giving thanks. I'm trying to get him to realize that holidays are more than just presents, Santa Claus and food.

At the end of class, he very proudly showed me the class mural. Kids had said, "I'm thankful for mommy", or 'butterflies' or "birdies". Jack had drawn a blue and black scribble. "Look mom, I'm Thankful for Power Rangers".

Mind you, this is a show he's never seen. He's just been in contact with it because boys at school talk about it (peer pressure at 3?).

I consulted the teacher, did he REALLY say he was thankful for (gasp) Power Rangers??

No, according to her, "He's really Thankful for the Power Rangers he's going to get for Christmas".

Oh, Really, huh?


Aaaargh Matey!

I just find this photo funny as hell. For some reason, John looks happiest posing with a Pirate Dog. He doesn't even look this happy in our wedding photos. He looks happier than the kids to be standing next to Pirate dog.

As for Pirate Dog, he just looks a little confused. Sorry buddy!! But, hey, he's a great dad, isn't he? Three cheers for Daddy and Pirate Dog!!!

The museum

Today we went to the Big City to the Children's museum. We had a blast.
Below, see Jack in the "climbing schooner" very very high in the air. It was made for kids 5 and up, or so it said. This 3 yr old took it on no problem. His mother however, had a heart attack and watched Nate play in the nearby safety town ambulance.

This is not ET, however after walking around the water exhibit for a while, I was craving Reese's Pieces.

More in the climbing schooner, and ET trying to drink the water at the exhibit. So Gross.

Digging for dinosaurs was tough work today!!!

The boy can EAT!

I am not entirely sure why, but most of the pictures we have of Nate involve him eating. Sometimes we can get him eating AND sleeping, at the same time. Not many people can participate in their two favorite activities at once, but he has made an Olympic event out of it.

Nate tries to steal others snacks in public. He has been known to eat off the floor (usually while I'm trying to clean the mess he has created with his food). He's been known to attempt to eat inedible objects, like leaves and rocks. Yes, the boy can eat, and when he does, he has a certain panache, if you will.

Forget handi-wipes, Bring in the hose!!

Sweet Girl

Here is the Divine Miss M at her finest...I love the tongue!
She just loves to smile at her Uncle Richie!
She is sooo baldie bald. And she looks just like her brothers. Thank goodness for pink!
I think this one may be my fave. She is just so innocent, and happy, and a great baby!

Full length shot...see how big she's getting? Oh, and notice the one sock. We have a rule in our may only wear one sock at a time.
Thought I'd share these... She's just sweet sweet sweet!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


I warn you, this blog is not for the squeemish. That being said, I'd like to thank my oldest for the quite visual and fragrant reminders that my bathrooms needed cleaning. Allow me to divulge more....

Monday, I went upstairst to check the progress of teeth brushing, when I encountered a horrid smell in the bathroom. I asked son if he forgot to flush and realized I was standing smack in the middle of a poo Picasso. It was smeared on the floor, the rug, the tub, the toilet, the sink, everywhere. I'd like to think that he was wiping, got some on his hands and proceeded to make art because he couldn't reach the faucet. However, after today I'm pretty sure numero uno has a poo fascination and I'm just grossed out.

Today we headed out to music class and to get Jack a haircut. I noticed a funk in the downstairs bathroom but didn't have time to figure it out until we came home 2 hours later. The boys were eating and I still couldn't find the source of the smell. After Monday's episode, I checked the counters and under the sink, and the garbage. No visual...until that is I opened the potty that hasn't been used for anything other than a stepstool for at least a year.

There, lying in the potty was a man sized poo that was making my bathroom smell like a porta potty. Of course I cleaned it out and disinfected and put the potty in the garage to avoid future issues, but I asked son when he did this. "Well mommy, I did it like, 2 days ago". It could be the truth, or just a bad sense of time for a 3 year old. 2 days ago was Monday though, and possibly just a poopy day in general.

This is the stuff you can't make up, and nobody tells you about this part of parenting. All you hear when you're pregnant is "Sleep now" or "Good luck with labor". Nobody ever says to you, "Hey, you may want to reconsider buying a new home because nobody really appreciates poo remnants smeared everywhere". Speaking of which, do they make the sellers of a house disclose any poo incidents, like they do when someone is murdered or dies in a house???

Parenting at it's finest.

Sunday, November 12, 2006


I did a 5K race with Steph today. She paced in at about a 10 minute mile, give or take a few seconds. I was tired since the baby was up at least twice last night and paced a 12 minute mile. Not too bad 3 mos. postpartum and out of shape, but not the greatest either.

It was fun, once you get past all the garbage in your head telling you how much it hurts, and how
crazy you are. Then you look around at the beautiful scenery and enjoy the run because you know at the end there will be food and water, and in some cases even beer (not today though).

The best parts of the race were A.) when I wanted to quit I "hooked up" with another lady and we ran the last 3/4 mile together. It was good motivation and incentive. B.) My sister met me slightly before the finish line and pushed me to the end by running with me. C.) We saw a really hairy guy and could laugh together and "Scary Harry" who by some freak of nature actually had more body hair than my brother, whom we have nicknamed the "Wookie".

We are hoping to do a Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving. I hope she finds one by her because the one by me doesn't cost anything to enter except a can of food for the food pantry, but doesn't give you a t-shirt either. When you run these things, it's all about the t-shirt.

Oh, and the beer and the food at the end don't hurt either. Thanks Steph, I had fun today!!!

Girl Talk

Thursday the girls came over for our monthly scrapbooking session. They scrapped, I wrote in the baby book. They left around 10:40 ish, at which point John asked me if we always stayed so late to scrapbook and gab. This was followed by a very confused: "But WHAT do you guys talk about for so long?"

Guys don't understand it I guess. Or they're insecure because they probably think we're talking about them, which is sometimes the case but not always. This week, we had riveting conversations about hemorrhoids, incontinence, how loud 3 year olds can be, Grey's Anatomy, the dynamics of the Reese/Ryan divorce, how being pregnant screws with your body and basically destroys it and how much fun THAT is, my new found love of the Momfidence book ( and dancing with the stars. We agreed that Mario is a little cocky.

These are all subjects that you simply cannot discuss with your husband, which is why we get together to gab. With your hubbie you're relagated to "safe" topics, such as the kids and bills and politics. Bring up the K-FED EX gossip and you are being tuned out. You can see the little radio of circus music playing in his head as you wonder how fat Tori Spelling is going to get, and how much she'll spend on plastic surgery post-delivery. I can visualize the eye rolling if the TomKat wedding is even brought up...

Yes, that is why girls get together. These things are not necessarily important to us in our lives, but sometimes a little mindless celebrity gossip is fun, especially when you are "on" all day with your kids.

Girl talk is simply essential to the survival of our femaleness. As the Spicegirls said "GIRLPOWER RULES"!!!

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Madilynn Grace

Take note mom, the spelling is MADILYNN.

The other day, my parents called to ask how Maddie spells her name. This would have offended someone else, I'm sure, since they only have 2 granddaughters and Brooke isn't easy to forget how to spell.

However, half the time I look at my kids and call them by the wrong name entirely (I've been known to call Jack "Richie", Nate "Jack", and Maddie "Nate"). When strangers ask me how old they are I actually have to STOP AND THINK ABOUT IT, because I've forgotten, and on a bad day, DO NOT even think of asking me how big they were and how much they weighed when they were born. I can't keep that crap straight, and it's all written down somewhere so that I don't have to.

No, I'm not offended when others forget details that I'm lucky myself to remember about the fruits of my loins. I'm lucky I remember they belong to me because believe me, there are days I try to forget!!

Weekly Lessons

Though it is only Thursday, I thought I'd write down a few things I've learned this week:

1. When Jack tells me he is going to "play doctor" at school with the girls, he and I have very different views on what it means to "play doctor".

2. Madilynn does not like baked Tostitos tortilla chips.

3. Madilynn does not like Extreme Cheddar Goldfish Crackers.

4. Madilynn does not like honey flavored Teddy Grahams.

5. It doesn't count as a first solid food if the 16 month old is shoving said food at the 2 month old.

6. Nathan really will bump his head on everything not padded.

7. My children occasionally find it amusing to skip their naps. I disagree with them on this subject.

8. I refuse to "agree to disagree" about aforementioned subject.

9. Jack loves Christmas music almost as much as I do.

10. My children's unending happiness really isn't my problem, now is it?

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Camera Thief!

My sister thinks it's funny to take random pictures of herself with other peoples cameras. They usually involve a pose much like this one, only her mouth is usually open. This picture is old, but I thought I'd put the warning out there. Beware where you lay your cameras!! You never know what you're going to get!!!

I am pretty sure at Brooke's college graduation someone will have memories like the one below to look back on fondly.......

Thank god for digital because I used to get entire rolls of this:

OH! The pain of it!!!

I have not been to yoga in a loooong time. I went today after church. I am going to be so so so so sore tomorrow. I'm already sore now. Oh. My. Gosh.

If you don't hear from me for a few days, it's probably because I am lying immobile somewhere (I'd like to think bed, but HA! to that happening) unable to even turn my head because I was massaging my insides using Ujahi (spelling?) breathing. How creepy is that? "Let's massage our internal organs using good breaths". Uh, what??? I love yoga, I do, and I usually feel better afterwards, but please don't tell me I'm massaging my insides.

Anyways, I'd prefer laying on a warm table with someone massaging my tense neck and know, massaging my outsides......

Saturday, November 04, 2006

And So It Begins.....

Today on my way to work I discoverd that a local radio station has begun its annual Christmas Themed programming. Meaning, all Christmas music, all the time. I cannot tell you how excited I was driving to work on a cloudy Saturday morning, drinking my coffee and listening to Christmas music.

I am of the opinion that there is no finer holiday season than the Christmas season. It's not about the presents, in case you're wondering. For me, Christmas has always been magical and beautiful. When they're not out in a mall shopping, people just seem nicer, or want to try to be better people anyway.

I love the lights, the music, the snow, the cold winter nights cuddling on the couch with a cup of hot cocoa and a good movie on. I love seeing my kids so excited. I love storefront decorations, and mall window shopping. I love hot soup and comfort food. I love the idea of peace on earth and good will towards men.

Most of all, I love "A Charlie Brown Christmas", "It's a Wonderful Life", "The Grinch", and all the holiday cartoon/claymation favorites (Frosty and Rudolph anyone?).

I love the fact that on my wedding day (December 16th) the church was decorated with poinsetta's and it snowed. The reception hall had a tree with lights on it and we played Christmas Carols during cocktail hour. It was a perfect day.

The Christmas season has begun, and with 3 kids, it doesn't get any better than this.

On losing your Mind

I think I'm going crazy. It is quite possible you know. I recently discovered that Thank you notes written for Maddie's baptism were just weird. I thanked people for the wrong things, or left things out altogether.

I think on one where Miss M. got 2 gifts from the same family, instead of thanking them for both gifts, I said thank you for the same gift twice. As in..."Thank you very much for my purple outfit. I will wear it a lot. Also, thanks for the purple outfit. I put it in my college fund, and it will come in handy in the future."

Yesterday I almost put a small grocery bag with 2 nasty diapers into the fridge. I had intended on taking them OUTSIDE to the garbage, but I guess when you go a little crazy diapers end up in the fridge.

I could also be just plain old exhausted with a newborn up to eat in the middle of the night, and a 16 month old up cutting teeth, and a 3 year old scared of some Halloween decoration that consisted of a talking head in a Globe. Some idiot told him it was grandpa's head and every night since Tricks or Treats I've found him in my bed. We've also had to call grandma and grandpa three times since then to ensure that it wasn't HIS grandpa's disembodied head in a globe.

Let's think of a better way next Halloween to petrify the 3 year olds, hmmmm?

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Recently Viewed

Watched a phenomenal movie yesterday called "Iris" starring Judi Dench and Kate Winslet, both outstanding British actresses. The movie was about Iris Murdoch and her demise via Alzheimer's.

British movies don't beat around the bush, and over expound on any given subject. I find British movies to be efficient, to the point, and raw. The movie was not about Alzheimer's though, it was a story about love and loving what is good in this life.

I highly recommend it.

The Efficiency of Toddlers

The funniest thing happened the other day. My baby Nate here was multi-tasking. Not only was he sleeping, but he was also eating an oreo. He was sooo tired he couldn't stay awake, but he was SOOO hungry for his cookie that he wasn't letting it go for anything or anyone.

Now THAT is what I call a gifted child....

Fun with Pumpkins

Pumpkin carving is a big deal. A fun tradition full of goop and glop and bloody injuries (Jack sliced open his finger...)

Either we don't feed Nate enough, or we don't love him enough. I can't figure out if he's trying to eat the pumpkin or kiss it. Either way, it's slightly disturbing.
The Alpha Males of the family, during some quality bonding time. Note the EXACT SAME EXPRESSIONS on their intense faces. The only difference is Dad's pumpkin had eyes and a nose. Jack's had some holes that led to his bloody injury when he poked a hole in the pumpkin with the designated pumpkin tool.
Note Nate's swanky get up. T-Shirt, diaper, and one sock. He takes after me in the style department.
Even the baby got in on the carving. She's awesome.

The Candy Capers

I am mortified and unsatisfied. My kids got the motherload of candy on Tuesday...they hit paydirt basically. I am pretty sure my chocolate purist friends will call for my lynching, but so far the only candy I've been able to happily filch from the kids is ONE bag of Skittles and TWO mini packs of Starbursts (that's 4 Starbursts total).

Now, don't get me wrong, I like chocolate too, but my favorite candies are Skittles and Starbursts. For all the houses the boys went to, only ONE bag of Skittles has emerged.

And, while I'm on the subject, what's up with those cheap skates who hand out Brach's Star Mint candies??? Oh, you know the ones that NO KID likes and basically guarantees an egging by the older trick or treaters. Seriously, you buy that crap in bulk and can get it at an Italian Restaurant with your bill.

I remember once as a kid getting walnuts at one house instead of candy. Healthy, sure...kid friendly NO WAY!! Poor Charlie Brown only got a rock. Fess up folks, what are your Halloween Horror Candies??? Can't wait to read them!!

Sunday, October 29, 2006



To your nearest bookstore and pick up a copy of "Momfidence, An Oreo Never Killed Anyone and other Secrets of Happy Parenting" by Paula Spencer.

Lose the Mom Guilt in a quick easy read....

This book is great, it talks about making parenting fun again, and not feeling bad that your kid is not an overscheduled piano playing Tolstoy reading genius. It's all about letting Kids be Kids and enjoying parenthood for what it is.

I never buy books, but I bought this one and will refer to it often in my daily life. HIGHLY recommended!!!

Thursday, October 26, 2006

The family

Here are some photos of my family. I Love these guys!!

No, he's not potty trained. He just thinks he's Mr. Big Pants.
This is the NEW and IMPROVED Kristen. We like her. She's really smart too, so we're still wondering what she likes about my brother!!! Okay, he's kinda cute..... (people say we look a lot alike) :-)
A rare quiet moment side by side. It's amazing what food can do for people.
The entire Fam. I think my dad was pinching my sister's butt. He thinks he's funny when he does that in picutres. From L-R there's Craig my Brother in Law and Brooke, my sister, my dad--who if he had more hair bears a striking resemlance to Earl from My name is Earl, Hubby John with Nate, Jack in front, Me and The Divine Miss M, Richie, and my mom. What a gang!
My ma and sister bought this little number at a Craft fair. I think the bow on the hat should go on the front, but I think it looks sassier to the side. I swear if she wasn't in pink you'd think she was one of the boys...they all look like their dad!!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006


Dear Julianne,

You have been writing a lot in your blog about chocolate. I am posting this recipe for you, but pretty much anyone can enjoy them. They are EASY EASY EASY!!

I grew up on these cookies and Jack ate 3 for breakfast the other day. Since they have oatmeal and peanut butter, I figured they were healthier than some cereals on the market these days, right?

So, everyone, enjoy. Talk about a craving fix!!! Beware, you can't stop eating at ONE cookie!!

Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies

2 1/2 Cups granulated sugar
2 T unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 cup butter
1/2 C milk
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 C creamy peanut butter (if you like nuts you can substitute chunky)
3 C QUICK COOKING (important) rolled oats, uncooked

In a saucepan, combine sugar, cocoa, butter, and milk. Slowly bring to a boil, stirring constantly. Boil ONLY for 1 minute (Use a timer and do not overcook). Remove from heat, stir in vanilla, PB and oats, mixing thoroughly. Drop by spoonfuls onto wax paper and let cool.
Yum yum yum!!!

Monday, October 23, 2006

Crime Fighters and Princesses

It's just a preview for next week, but wouldn't you want this Batman and Robin Dynamic Duo to come KAPOW!! and BAM!! and ZOWIE!!! the evil doers in your local suburbs?

And Miss M? She's sweet sweet sweet. Her picture is old, but pretty much that's what she does---sleep through the antics of Mutt and Jeff.

This is when kids are fun. This is when I can say I enjoy motherhood. However, at 2 a.m. I'm sure I'll be writing a different tune---SOOO tired!

Bosses Day vs Sweetest Day

Happy Sweetest day. Belated. Of course it's a Hallmark Holiday, but every once in a while it's nice to give and recieve a card that says you still love someone, even when the trials of daily life don't necessarily allow for adult conversation.

I forgot all about Sweetest day, but remembered my mom's birthday, so when buying her card I noticed the Sweetest cards. I also saw the Bosses day cards and remembered that Mr. Big Pants (John) got a promotion recently and is a true Boss at work. He was ahem...upset that his employees didn't recognize him on bosses day. This from the man who never recognized his bosses ever, but still.

So, I considered getting him a bosses day card for sweetest day, but then I remembered, DUH! He is NOT the boss of me, no matter what anyone thinks, so a cartoon Cat saying a goofy poem about spending money and breaking appliances it it is every Sweetest day and Valentine's day.

Then I felt like garbage because for a Hallmark Holiday he got me a massage and made dinner. He said the massage was for all the work I did for Maddie's baptism, but I still feel like a bad wife. I didn't get him a gift. Aaaargh!

Maybe I'll make it up to him and let him be the boss of me for a little while. Maybe that will be gift enough....only for a LITTLE while though.....

A Month of Meals

Well, I did it. Yesterday my friend and I, along with her good friend got together in her kitchen and made 24 freezable meals. I am sooo excited about this once a month cooking thing. 4 p.m. seems to be witching hour here, some days I have all 3 children screaming and yelling at me. It is not stressful at all, really.

Anyway, it's really hard to make dinner at that time, but family dinner when John gets home at 6 is really important to me. Even if I have to leave to the next room to breastfeed, the t.v. is off and we are there as a family. What to do, what to do?

Solution: we made meals for a month. All I have to do is take one out of the freezer in the garage, thaw and cook according to the directions on the label our friend made. Easy breezy.

John was laughing at me earlier today (he works from home Mondays and Fridays) because I took chicken out to thaw. He said "Uhh, didn't you spend NINE HOURS cooking yesterday? Why are you thawing chicken?" Obvious answer: Why waste a frozen meal when he's home to help supervise and calm screaming children? Right? Am I right? Of course I am!!

Soo, the 30 day gourmet has yet to be tested. But I'm sure it will be fine. The best part is that it averages out to about $9 per meal to feed my family. That's a complete meal folks, meat, veggie, and starch. How awesome is THAT???

A Butt!! And A Wave!

Jack thinks he's superman. He really does. And I love my dad and Uncle for putting in my new carpet (finally) but I know that right below the bottom step it will get worn out quickly, simply from Superman "flying" (and landing quite heavily) on the living room floor.

Next time you want to fly, just put your arms up, yell "A Butt, and a wave" just like the Big S man himself, and you too can pretend to enjoy my soft new carpet and thick padding that will last about another 50 flights or so.....

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Skinny Girls Suck

In case you don't know, there's a new show on CMT about Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader tryouts. These girls are very very very very in shape. They make a new mom feel, um, a little on the plus size side.

Anywho...I was watching last night and I think I now know why I'm depressed and crabby today. These gals are in training camp, with the coach and choreographer commenting on 'So and so is a little thick in the arms, don't you think?". And, "So and So needs to lose some weight". HELLO???? These girls look like they need a few happy meals and then some!! They are all SKINNY SKINNY SKINNY!!

CMT just lost MY count in the Nielsen ratings. From now on, I'm sticking to nice shows, Like Celebrity Fit Clubs, and Biggest Loser. And least those people don't make my size 8 butt look like I should be the next Anna Nicole look alike. In fact, they make me feel like I could be one of the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders.

If only I could still do the splits....

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Fall Fun

Last Saturday we went to a pumpkin farm near our house. I learned a few things that day.

#1: Nate DOES NOT like pony rides.

#2 As much as he loves animals, sheep kinda freak him out.

#3. If we lived on a farm, Jack could drive the tractor...if it had no engine and worked with pedals.

#4. Being a grown up means you'd look silly sliding down this fun pile of straw. I also learned that growing up and being a parent kind of stinks...all the kids looked like this hayrolling was at the very least, the best thing they'd ever done.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Under Witch's Hats

Jack is learning the Pledge of Allegiance at school. He's got the "under God" line down right, but that's about it. It could be due to the fact that I think he's trying to rival Uncle Richie for the title of "Ultimate Class Clown".

When the teacher called us in yesterday before pickup to listen to all the darling voices recite the pledge, there was Jack, under the toy workbench, not listening, and definitely NOT reciting the pledge. When we got home we had a chat and have been practicing. I just don't have the heart to correct:

"and to the public,
under witches hats...
under God,
Under God......"

That is where he gets stuck.

So until then, Under witches hats under God we go.

Friday, October 06, 2006


You know you are officially OLD OLD OLD when you take your kids out for a walk to the hill at the end of the block, teach them how to logroll by logrolling down the hill yourself, and you get dizzy. Very very very in still haven't recovered an hour later dizzy.

I may be old, but I had fun logrolling, and laughing on this beautiful fall sunshiney day. The boys seemed to love playing together too, despite bronchitis (Jack), and teething (Nate).

Oh, and I only got 2 "Wow, you have your hands full" comments today. One at the mall (had to buy nursing bras) and one while logrolling. So, I guess even when I look like I'm having fun (which I was) people still need to comment on my choice to have 3 kids.


Thursday, October 05, 2006

Fun with Nate

While Jack was in school today, I took the babies out with a friend for a walk on a nature path on School grounds. It was a perfectly crisp fall day, and I had a blast with my happy, beautiful, smiley boy.

I loved every minute! He is such a sweet, funny, and fun loving kid. I enjoy spending some special time with him, and he enjoys the donuts he got that he didn't have to share with his brother.

Here he is right before Brooke's baptism. I've been told that the only thing I've really taught him about life so far is how to use this fine bit of technology. I think I have a very similar photo of Jack... I love these boys!!