Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Graduation

Nobody ever tells you how depression parenting can be. You get sad every birthday, weepy or morose at every milestone-because your 'baby' is growing up. I've been avoiding this post for that reason. My 'baby' is no longer a 'baby'.


Really though, I can't decide why it's so depressing. Is it because he's growing up, or I'm getting older. When in the world did I get old enough, and grow up enough to be a parent of a kindergartner? How did THAT happen? Where did the past 5 years go?

What is REALLY upsetting is that I feel like I can't remember a lot of it, due to having to very exuberantly live in the present tense. I don't remember every milestone for every kid, and for whatever reason I feel like those were supposed to be important enough to remember.

At scrapbooking a few weeks ago as I did Maddie's baby book, I couldn't remember how old she was when she was crawling, getting teeth, and eating solids, and all that other stuff. But, I DO remember her 2 surgeries like they were yesterday. I remember she walked at 9 months old. I don't know if that makes me a bad parent, a normal parent, or just one who is trying to survive childhood. But I don't want to just survive it. I want to treasure it, and it seems like the more I try, the faster and more fleeting it goes.

Back to graduation. I get it. He's 4 and graduating from pre-school, so it's not like there's a lot of academic accomplishments to embellish on. It was more a cute little ceremony, designed to make mommies weep, and help transition the kids. Jack was very excited, but having a hard time with not going to St. Barnabas anymore. I know he will love kinneygarten. He sucks up information like a little sponge, so I am looking forward to him learning a lot!



This is Mr. Man. Pre-Ceremony. All dandied up in his shirt and tie, and new haircut. And dancing. Always dancing, dressing up, smiling, mostly happy. Except when he is arguing with me and debating the finer points of life.



Boys. Aren't they handsome little devils?

Family photo. I love this, because although there were a couple of us all looking at the camera, this is more typical of us. Notice Nate's bare feet. Always. The kid feels the world thru his toes.



This is Jack at Graduation receiving his diploma. It was really a Bible, and all the Biblical stuff they have learned the past 2 years is from this particular Bible. It's very cute, picutres, and all, and the wording is extremely kid friendly. Not like his other "kid" Bible that shows a cartoon Jesus in pain on the cross. I mean, I know they need to learn the story of Easter, but for a little kid, graphic nails in hands and feet is a bit much--even if it is a cartoon.


I got him a DQ chocolate extrememe ice cream cake, and OH MYGOSH YUMMMY!!! I highly recommend it. I had them write on it, but what do you write for a 4 year old graduating preschool? Congratulations seems a bit stiff, especially when we're just celebrating a transition in life, rather than any actual achievements. I chose "Way to Go!". I should have had "Way to Go MOM" put on there, because it's due to all my hard work, dedication, and sacrifice he's gotten this far, don't you think?

Oh well. Summer has officially begun, so I'm busy training, planning field trips and mentally preparing myself for the first day of 'big kid school'. That's gonna be a tough one-emotionally speaking.

Thank goodness I have 3 and 1/2 months to prepare myself!

2 comments:

jen said...

I cried for Jonathan's 1st b-day, his preschool grad day, 1st day of kindergarten, all of his performances, 1st communion, you get the picture...It's soooo hard watching these babies grow up and become the people God intended them to be. I will never remember the little things like teeth, rolling over, but the big stuff will never be forgotten. Even if I remember them through my swollen tear filled eyes! Congrats to Jack and onward and upward, big kid school makes for all new big kid fun? and memories!
Jen

Weiss Women said...

I'm a cryer. I cry at everything and I cry at other people's childrens events. I'm an emotional sap. Tomorrow is Olivia's Pre-school graduation. I am charging up all batteries for the cameras and I am filling my bag with kleenex. Way To Go Jack! I wish I could eat some of that cake!