Let's just Be Brave about it, And Eat Our Tacos if we want to

I finally spoke with Granny today. She is home, doing well. She was diagnosed with Mesothelioma, a riveting and dire explanation of which can be found here: http://www.webmd.com/cancer/tc/mesothelioma-treatment-patient-information-nci-pdq-treatment-options-for-malignant-mesothelioma

Apparently, this cancer is associated with people exposed to asbestos, or radiation. Since she can't figure out when and if she was ever exposed to asbestos, we're just assuming that the radiation treatments she had to cure her breast cancer jump started this other horrible disease. Tit for tat in its most grotesque form.

To say the woman is dying is saddening, maddening, and an overexaggeration of the truth, because really, aren't we all? Yesterday, in less than a half hours time I was told she had two months to live...then "NO, it's not that bad. She should feel better in two months. People have lived up to 5 years with this cancer." Right. 5 years. I can only hope that Gram will choose quality of life over simple quantity, but it is her decision to make.

In speaking with her today, she seems bound and determined to fight for as long as she can. In her words, she has too many children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren that she loves and wants to spend time with. Truth be told, we all want her around for a while too, but if it comes down to hanging around in pain or going in peace I opt for #2. I've got a lifetime's worth of good memories, and I don't need a few extra months of her lingering in the hopes of creating more.

I know it sounds morbid. Maybe I'm taking the wrong approach, but in her own words, she feels that this will be what brings about her "demise". This disease is going to kill her. Now let's put what we know to good use with the time frame we have, and really we don't know anything and won't know anything until her doc appt. on Aug. 12th. I hope she is well enough to spend some time with us for Maddie's birthday. It will be a small gathering of my family, and it will be lovely if she can join us.

As I was talking to her, she was getting ready to eat lunch. She was craving a Taco Bell taco (shhh, don't tell my uncle!) and didn't care really about healthy eating. Her blood sugar was fine (she's a diabetic), and really, what the hell? You want some Taco Bell, eat some. I told her she needed some ice cream too, a true diabetic no no. She confided she had a hidden Frosty in the freezer. You go Gram. Fight your fight. Eat your nasty Taco Bell tacos (still trying to figure out THAT craving), and eat Frosties.

Enjoy the time that you're given. God has given you the gift of knowing how and presumably when, so now the rest of us get to let you know how loved you are. Next time I visit we'll have some greasy burgers, and fries, and maybe some chocolate shakes to boot. I promise.