The Poop Contest

Shield your eyes if you are squeamish. This one's a goody.

Yesterday we were driving home from Brycie Boo's 2nd birthday. Nate was in the back half asleep, and I don't WANT him asleep because we were at a place called Germ Zone. Or Jump Zone, I get confused. Either way, all 3 of my darlings needed to bathe, thus I decided to regale him with stories of how I was going to eat his Halloween candy. Oh yes I did.

Then, because the child is now FULLY awake, he decides to segue somehow from eating all of his Reese's (which his father can have because I don't like peanut butter and chocolate mixed together, it's just WRONG. Wrong like Neopolitan ice cream, but that's another story altogether), Nate decides that we are going to have a POOP CONTEST.

He laid out the rules. Basically, you have to poop on a plate. If you have the biggest poop, you win a prize. If you have the smelliest poop, you win a prize. Your coveted prize? A sock. Not a pair. Just. a. sock.

I can't help wondering if he translates this to creative writing if he'll get in trouble, or if his teacher will someday appreciate the thought that went into this idea.

I also can't help wondering why my kids are so gross and where I went wrong.......