Happy Mother's Day to Me

My mother's day this year was spent at church, Maddie's first dance recital, and then bbq'ing at home with my family-who of course wouldn't have missed Maddie's first recital for the world.

This is Ms. M at her rehearsal the day before. I had Jenny braid her hair. See her "Madditude"? It didn't leave her. She didn't even smile in the professional photos. So like her father...not shy exactly, but really not a fan of having a lot of attention and eyes on her either. So, here she is at said recital. I'd post video, but she didn't do anything but stand there shooting darts with her eyes at her teacher in the wings. At one point, she moved her arm slightly. Sigh...I didn't expect much, really. She IS only 2...and she DID look super cute, thanks to Auntie doing her hair in a cool circle braid and accessorizing with make-up. I suppose I'm just glad that a.) she didn't run off stage screaming or stand there crying and b.) she really does enjoy ballet class. She does everything she's supposed to in her little ballet room.

The first "daddy-daughter dance"? Not a chance...check out the 'tude on the chick, saying "Yah, uh, NO dad. I don't think so".
Lastly, I got some beautiful fluers on Mom's day. I am a lucky lady.

And so, I impart my latest top 10 list in honor of Mother's Day:

TEN THINGS I HAVE LEARNED SINCE BEING A MOTHER:

1.) Poop is important. As a mother, you will discuss size, frequency, color, duration,consistency and other oddities in reference to your children's bowel movements. You will also do this with the clinical judgement and coolness of a true physician. Life is measure in poop people.

2.) I hate Caillou. I also have a serious problem with talking bunnies with no mother.

3.) Even if you try to prevent guns in your home, boys will find a way, so don't bother. They will break their hangers, bite their toast, chew their gum, and snap Lego's all into gun formations.

4.) Creative parenting is fun...like when you get to tell your child that if they touch another dead field mouse again they will be taken to the hospital for fear of "BACTERIA" and could wind up with 100's of shots and needles in their belly.

5.) Watching your child's face as you ignore a tantrum is as pricelss as a Van Gogh painting.

6.) Mom's nights out are a must, if you plan on retaining any form of sanity and maternal instinct that you care to act on.

7. That (number 6) goes double for a bottle of booze...any kind.

8.) Oma's and Opa's are a good deflector strategy when your child is talking incessantly and/or performing a behaviour they don't care about bothering mom and dad with. Start dialing Mom's mom...she puts things to rights.

9.) I now know where kids eat free and on what days. I love not having to cook, maybe once or twice a month. And I also know to avoid those places at any other given time....

10.) Toothpaste and boogers can and will stick to walls,sinks, bathtubs, toilets, doorknobs, drawerpulls and lightswitches...and they are like magic...just as you wipe it off it will somehow reappear....