Chuckie's Bride Lives With My Sister, so Watch Out!

My sister starts out a conversation during opening her daughter's birthday gifts with something along the lines of how sweet and cuddly her neighbor is. Who also happens to be older and missing a few fries from the order. Whatever. Then she goes on to say things like how nice this lady is, she just "shows up" and gives her kids her old stuff from her closet. Toys and games and whatnot. And then she says, "And look what she gave Brooke...just because!" Showing us this: After my initial shock and revulsion and multiple expletives, and gasps of "What the HELL? What in the hell is that thing?" I was informed it was some Madame Alexander doll. Uh, not to me baby. That is pure Bride of Chuckie material.

I don't know about you all, but I am NOT a doll fan. I used to pull Barbie's heads off because, well it was Barbie. And her head just came off soooo easily. After seeing this real Shirley Temple Doll now I know why I ripped their heads off...so they couldn't see to attack me and eat my face off while I was sleeping. My brother in law wants to get rid of the doll. I can't say I blame him, because it looks cursed. But my sister thinks it's worth a lot of money. So I say sell it, get rid of it. That is the stuff of nightmares.

You can almost hear it intoning..."Animal crackers in my soup...monkeys and rabbits loop the loop...don't fall asleep with me near, I just might nibble off your ear!"