The Hooligan Squad

My kids are nuts. Pretty certifiably. Unless I'm the one that's nuts, and since no one has had the mercy to lock me in a padded room, I get to regale you with my stories.

Often times, the boys get the nicknames of Beevis and Butthead. One blond, one dark. Sitting on the couch grunting 'laughs'. You think it's a t.v. show. That's a joke. It's my living room.

Last night I took the boys to their school for a Don't Stop The Music program, where there is singing, and dancing, and learning of instruments and how to clap out rhythms, etc. You can drop your kids off, and since they have a hard time participating when I'm there, I decided to do the drop off. Maddie and I needed to run to the grocery store for some things for this party I'm having here Saturday. John was doing Christmas things that cannot be done with kids around, if you know what I mean.

So, I plunked them into 2 folding chairs, said hello the the speech therapist, waved at the Principal, and cockily took my merry ass to Jewel/Osco.

They were supposed to be performing at 7:15, and I got back just in time. I looked in the dance crowd for Nate. Then Jack. They were nowhere to be found. Then....I see them. Pointing at me and laughing. They were in the EXACT same spots I'd left them in an hour earlier. They hadn't even taken off their hats. Or gloves. Or coats. They hadn't moved. In an hour. Obviously they did not participate either.

I was, for lack of a better word, FURIOUS! But I was also laughing to myself. What the hell is wrong with these kids? Mostly I was mad because the high school kids work really hard on a volunteer basis to put together such an awesome program. Then I figured, this will be the story they tell each other, when they're in high school sharing a beer (trust me, I know that one's coming. I'm not even in denial) saying, and laughing in their Beevis and Butthead voices...

"huh huh huh....remember the time, when mom made us go to that STOOPID music program.... and we did nothing. Yah, that was funny. Huh huh huh huh huh..."

Their first drunk story. I am so freaking proud.