Hair Cut

A couple of months ago, Tow Nater got his first snip job. I post it now because it was weeks before his 2nd birthday, and he had this really cute David Beckham thing going on. Also, my niece with the wild woman hair just had her first haircut. She's barely a year old. At the rate my kids go, Maddie will not need a haircut, trim, or clean up until she's about 5 years old.

Notice how he's trying to lean forward away from the stylist. This is not because he was nervous or scared about his first haircut. Rather, she was making it too hard for him to see the t.v.
Again, trying VERY hard to see what's on the boob tube. It wasn't workin' for him that day.
Look at his eyes. It's like an evil glare that he's being kept from the t.v. Maddie in the background looks like a doll in a stroller doesn't she?

I love his shorter hair. Watch out Becks! He's younger than you, and WAY cuter!

Currently Reading:

"We're Just Like You, Only Prettier" by Celia Rivenbark (www.celiarivenbark.com)
It's a funny, easy read. I highly recommend it.

Next Up: Harry Potter

Don't nobody better spoil it for me. Or talk to me in the days it takes me to read it and weep.

Pirate Park

Friday we took the kids to a local amusement park with a pirate theme. They loved it. Here is a brief snyopsis in photos....

Maddie, before we left had to eat breakfast in Nate's chair. She looks like an old lady here, doesn't she? Actually, she looks just like her dad.
Nate on the paddle boats. He tried for a while. Then he gave up. They apparently were too much work, so he just floated around like a King on his Barge, and let the teenage workers push him around. Nate on the train. Oh yes, he got to pull the ding dong bell roughly 8, 000 times.
Climbing wall. Jack remembered from last year that you had to be a 4 year old to do it. A lot rides on age when you're a 4 year old. He climbed up too, about 30 feet up. Give or take a heart attack or two.
Madilynn and daddy on the choo choo. Like Me and Mini-me. Cute ness.

CATS

I hate them. I do. And what is contributing immensely to this rant is that there is a neighborhood stray that my next door neighbor insists on feeding, so the cat keeps crapping in my yard and I don't find it until I mow the yard and it explodes under the blades and causes such a god-awful smell I want to pick it up and fling it at my neighbor's windows.

Cats are nasty animals. I know I'm probably pissing off a lot of people, but I can't hide who I am, and I don't care to actually. I have been diligently clearing my yard of weeds, and those prickly plants because I have 3 hillbilly children who like to roam barefoot. Now they can't because they might step in Cat do-do that is infested with who knows what germs and tapeworms and etc.

I think next time I find turds I am calling animal control and insisting they put this animal out of it's misery. NO, DO NOT TAKE IT TO THE SHELTER THAT HAS SQUEEZED THOUSANDS OUT OF UNSUSPECTING ELDERLY. Put it to rest in kitty cat heaven the way the good lord intended.

It is unfortunate that John likes cats. It is a sign from God that he is deathly allergic. I find it just WRONG that an animal can crap in a box in the kitchen (or living room or wherever) and you have to clean it up or they won't go again until they find a nice corner of the house. Sure, I change diapers and wipe butts all day, but then, like a good Christian I put all the nasties in a contained garbage receptacle to be shipped out to a landfill. I don't keep it laying around open for all to smell in the middle of the house somewhere.

I hate cats. I hate when ANY animal craps in my yard, but mostly when cats do it. The only good cat is a dead cat, as far as I'm concerned.

And to borrow a phrase, THAT is how I roll.

Fun at the Faire

On Sunday we went the the Renaissance Faire. I think we went more out of habit and tradition than because we actually wanted to. My brother brought his new woman, and my sister's family joined in on the fun.

Now, for those of you unitiated in the 'fun' of the faire, you can either check it out at www.renfair.com or, take it from me that you pay an exhorbitant entry fee (thank God kids were free) to watch a bunch of white trash traipse around in chain mail bras with their belly flab hanging out (and this is usually, most likely non-kid induced belly flab), while smoking cigarettes, drinking beer, and trying to talk in a really really bad Elizabethan England accent.

This isn't to say we didn't have a good time. The actual people who work at the fair have amazing costumes, and we even got to see the "Queen" of England. The kids loved seeing all the people dressed up and we let them play a few games, but of course, they cost money to do. It's ridiculously expensive, but hey, you get to see a joust and Jack and Maddie sat in the very front and had horse dirt kicked on them, and they LOVED it!

A Proud moment for any mother. The boys are shooting plastic suction cup darts out of crossbows. Nathan shot the lady in charge several times. He didn't win a prize. Jack and Brooke on the hand turned butterfly swings. Good times.

Nate and Maddie shared a swing.
Jack thought this guy was cool. He was actually a very nice man behind the mask too, even though he may have supposed to have been a 'bad guy'. This guy rocked. He had feathers across his back like wings. He was also very jolly.

Bat Mitzvah

"For me the different religions are beautiful flowers from the same garden, or they are branches of the same majestic tree. Therefore, they are equally true, though being received and interpreted through human instruments equally imperfect. Hence the necessity for tolerance, which does not mean indifference towards one's own faith, but a more intelligent and purer love for it. Tolerance gives us spiritual insight, which is as far from fanaticism as the North Pole is from the South. True knowledge of religion breaks down the barriers between faith and faith and give rice to tolerance. Cultivation and tolerance for other faith's will impart to us a truer understanding of our own." Mahatma Gandhi (From our Bat Mitzvah program)

John and I were blessed to attend a Bat Mitzvah for a former student of mine. It was quite an amazing ceremony. She not only made her Bat Mitzvah, but also made her Catholic confirmation earlier this year. It was incredible...she had her Catholic Priest present and he gave a wonderful blessing to the family and Rabbi, and well, the Rabbi was so warm and welcoming to everyone there.

For a person such as myself questioning beliefs and religion and always since the day I was born questioning what others told me to do 'just because' I found this ceremony spoke to my heart. I always have been jealous of those people who are "religious zealots" because they are mired in their convictions. They know they are right. They believe what they believe with their whole heart. I feel like an impostor every Sunday at Church because I am so unsure but I take the kids anyway because I want them to know there is something bigger than themselves, be whatever that may be.

The ceremony itself was not to be missed. My former student who I knew as a little 6 year old in pigtails was now a woman in the eyes of her faiths, both Catholic and Jewish. She read in Hebrew from the Torah, and I was beyond impressed, even if I didn't know what she was saying and couldn't tell if she made a mistake or not. It takes a certain something to get up in front of a hundred or so people (even family and close friends) and do what she did.

The absolute best part of the ceremony was the blessing her parents gave her. Both came up and gave speeches, written separately and with much thought and love. How incredible it must be to have your parents stand in front of God and everybody and declare what a wonderful person you are, and shout from the mountaintops how much they love you. I mean, we all know we love our kids, but do we ever stop to tell them as they get older and older what a gift they truly are to not only us, but the world at large? We all know our parents love us as well, but they way this is done is so special, and sentimental, and for lack of a better word holy. I tried to think what I would say to each of my own kids, because although they are all so similar, and they are good kids, what I'd have to say to each of them would be so very different.

How amazing this life is. Another quote from today:

"To Be is a miracle. To sense that I am here, in this time, in this space, so unique an special. One day I appeared on this earth an said: I am I. That is miracle enough. In the endless empty spaces of the universe, in the mystery of the secret workings of all things, it is the greater wonder that I am, that I fill the emptiness with life, that I experience myself and know about myself, and that I penetrate to the outside and meet you. I will not search for miracles but become conscious that I am miracle enough. I will celebrate myself an You celebrate me."

And so my 3 little darlings, you are Miracles in and of yourselves. And I love you all very much.

Of Course She's fine!

We got M's blood test results and of course everything is fine. Her iron is still low, but at 32 now while normal is 37. She's still on iron drops but otherises, there's nothing wrong with her. She's just tiny.

A PSA from your Friendly Neighborhood Hillbillies...

Can you blame me? It was Hot, we were playing in the sprinkler. At least Nate is wearing shoes!

Okay, not my finest hour at parenting, but they slept great that night.


It is so hard to be so cool when you're 4. Trust me.


At least he is wearing a helmet. And his underwear. And his shoes are tied. What more should I ask for?

Happy Girl

If I was an artist I could do something cool with this photo. It's one of my faves. For now, I'll just enjoy how happy she is, and relish the sound of her laughing out loud in the backseat today as we took a family trip to Jack's baseball practice. She really cracked her own shit up today. Loved it!

Word of the Week

Gription:
Something John made up and then got mad at Websters for putting it in and not giving him credit. That's all you really need to know about it.

What 6 Grand Gets ya These Days

A poke in the eye. Literally. We got the hospital bill today, and the procedure that lasted 30 minutes costs 6 grand. This does not even include the anasthesiologists bill, or her actual opthalmologists bills. We can hardly wait.

In the meantime, we are still waiting to hear about her blood test results to see if she has a thyroid problem, diabetis, inadequate amounts of growth hormone, or something else preventing her from gaining weight. We know she has low iron, as in April her levels were at 18 and normal is 37-102. That is fixable with daily drops. I just keep telling her doctor, yes she eats, yes she eats like a pig, and someday I'm bringing in John's family photos. She is lucky enough to have the genes from her paternal grandfather in that John's side of the family is not very big. At 11 months, she's a hefty 16 lbs 5 oz, which I think the boys surpassed by their 3 month mark, easily.

On a side note, I bought her her FIRST pair of shoes (Thank you very much $45 later at Stride Rite) because she is out and out walking. Her legs are so skinny that with these size 3 1/2's, she looks like she's wearing Bozo T. Clown shoes. I'd rather have her go barefoot, but at a wood chip park, she gets pretty ticked, so Shoes it is.

Now, to get those blood test results.....

Because Doesn't every Kid need....

An inflatable bouncer in your living room?
Action Shot. Jack loves this thing. It's the first thing he asks for in the morning after a little breakfast and TV.
Action shot 2: Nate goes down the slide and says, "Whhhheeee". Even little Mads loves this thing. She laughs as she tries to walk around while the boys are jumping. And yes, at 10 mos. she is WALKING. Everywhere. Sure, she looks like Frankenstein. But she is walking.

These 2 together crack me up. I think they were wondering what happened to their brother, AKA "Entertainment Central".

The Maddie Saga

Isn't she just a little stinker???

Happy 4th of July everyone! Playing the Drums at Grandma and Grandpa's with all her cousins and paternal Aunts and Uncles.

We went today for all 3 kids' well "baby" visits. Jack is healfy, Nate is healfy, and Maddie.... Presumably so. She is still in the 2-3% for weight (80 th for height) so this week we have to have a blood draw to check her CBC and Iron again since that was so low in April, along with blood sugar and thyroid. He doesn't believe that she has a thyroid thing because she's getting taller etc.

I'm wondering, can't she just be skinny?

By the way, her eye looks fantastic!!! Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers.

Word of the Week

I have to give my friend Jen credit where it is due. She came up with and coined the term...

Geek Porn: Any item, such as "How to win this video game", and/or pc gamer magazines, or "how to work your computer for fun" etc. It's like GQ or FHM, but for the Geek who can't get enough of their puties.

Of course, Jen was referring to her husbands Huge collection of PC gamer mags which had to be relocated when they needed the room they were stored in to house the new baby. Still, "Geek Porn" can refer to anything a man decides is more interesting than shall we say, real life.

Most parents do not have the joy of seeing what their 10and 1/2 month old would look like drunk, or stoned if you will. However, we lucked out on that one. Yesterday was Maddie's Surgery on her clogged tear duct. We had to be at the hospital at 8:30, and she couldn't have anything to eat or drink past midnight the night before. THAT was very very hard, because you know that when we got there she was thirsty, hungry, and CRABBY.

Everyone was sooo sweet though. She was definitely the youngest patient that morning, so everyone was fawning over her. I was just a tad bit nervous about the whole putting her under thing until Dr. FeelGood (the anasthesiologist) came in. I recognized him as being the GOD who gave me my epidural for Maddie's delivery.

For those of you who don't know, not only did my best friend deliver her as a Labor and Delivery nurse, but she made sure I delivered on the day when the best "Dr. Feel Good" was in the house. And if you remember nothing about the day your children are delivered, you can certainly pick out of a crowd of a million the man who came and took your pain away. And from what I understand, without needing to know specifics, this man knows his shit.

So, when he walked into the room, I was relieved. They were going to try and operate without anything more than a happy gas mask, but due to the nature of the surgery and the size of the mask, they couldn't wing it with where the Dr. needed to get into her eye, so she was put under via IV general anasthesia and intubated. The hospital was good enough to do both of those when she wasn't with us anymore.

The nurses were very sweet. They came and gave her a sedative. When that kicked in (and oh, did it kick in), they wrapped my baby up in a blankie and carried her into the OR. The last thing I saw before she went in was her waving "bye-bye". Roughly 1/2 an hour later, her opthalmologist came in and told us all was well, she's awake and not happy about it, see you in a week.

We went in and found a nurse holding her and doing the "mommy sway". If you don't know what that is, I'm not going to explain it other than it's instinctual to mommy's when a baby is crying and in pain. Apparently, the use of general anasthesia made her agitated enough that when she came out of it, she got mad and threw her bunny/comfort item at the nurses. That's my girl. Give 'em hell, even when you're all doped up!

She continued to sleep, until I finally woke her, made her eat and took her home. We stopped on the way for a Frosty for her sore post-intubation throat. That couldn't have felt good. If they had a drive thru where you could get shots of any high shelf liqour, we would've stopped there too.

She slept comfortably most of the rest of yesterday, and today you'd never know she had surgery. Even her eye looks the same with discharge and goop, but we're putting on the antibiotic ointment so it doesn't get infected. Pray this worked, so she doesn't need 'further procedures".

And for fun...

Maddie before sedatives.....


Maddie after sedatives..... What a difference 10 minutes makes! I think they should give some version of this stuff to parents of the surgical babies. I certainly could've used it instead of the 22 cups of coffee I drank in the 1/2 hour she was in surgery.

Word of the Week #2

I couldn't resist this one:

MOIST.

Is there any grosser word in the American language? Just saying it makes my mouth feel dirty.

EEEWWWW.

Moist.

Crab Legs

Directly from the files of "Conversations I can't Believe I really Just Had":

"Mom, I gotta go poo poo".

"Great. Thanks for the announcement."

"Wow!!! I have lots of poo poos. This one is JUST LIKE A CRAB LEG."

I'm not sure what disturbs me more, the food reference, or the fact that we are in fact, having a really poopy discussion......

Word of the Week

I've decided to post a word of the week. This week, it's MANCAVE.

Mancave (n): A place (most usually a basement, and most often an unfinished one) where MEN retreat, hide, play video games, read porn, pretend to "fix stuff", build model boats, and otherwise hide from their wives, children, or other relatives.

Some mancaves have (and I've seen them) a random toilet in the middle of an unfinished basement. Some Mancaves look like toys r us vomited all over the floor, yet husbands hole themselves up on the computer down there in the dark to virtually shoot and kill 12 year olds in some on-line combat something or other stupid game.

Some mancaves have been in the process of being "remodeled" for 13 years.

Do you have a "MANCAVE" story??? I'd love to hear it!!!